I just shared a lift (or elevator if you’re one of the people in America who reads this) with Nicky Campbell (or Satan if you’re one of the people in America who reads this). I’m convinced it was his malignant influence which led to my Costa Coffee double choc-chip muffin with chocolate goo in the middle being wrapped in plastic and slightly smaller than usual.

Also, speaking of Satan and stuff, how pointless does this look? They’d better not try to remake Rosmary’s Baby.