Apologies in advance for the incomprehensible nature of this post.

OK, I’ve linked my Wii account to my Nintendo club account so in a sane world I’d be able to simply buy Wii credits with those points which I could then use to buy virtual console/Wii-ware titles. In this sane world there would be no problem for Nintendo in providing me with these credits and I could just buy them whenever I had enough points (you earn points by buying certain Nintendo games, usually the first party ones and a few key franchises, advance wars etc.). Instead I have to order credits in groups of 500, 1000 or 1500 (conveniently the precise value of nothing in the Wii shop so you always have unusable change) and they get delivered to your door in the form of a card with a handy string of numbers and letters that you have to laboriously type in using the Wii’s on screen keyboard. Oh yeah and they’re never in stock. Yes that’s right a purely imaginary currency which never need exist in the physical world but for stupid Nintendo reasons does, is always out of stock. So I’m unable to spend my points.

And now to add to my woes Nintendo inform me that my points are going to start expiring at the end of the month. Do you have any idea how long it’s taken me to save up over 10,000 of those fuckers? Bloody ages that’s how long! Each game you buy gives you about 250 so those of you who can do mental arithmetic can probably work out how much of my cash I’ve thrown at Nintendo over the years (not including console purchases, 2 GBA SPs, a Gamecube, Wii, 2 DS’s some plastic bongo drums etc.). I prefer not to do that calculation. Is it too much to ask for a little something back? I really don’t want to be spending my hard earned points on princess peach mobile phone wallpaper.

:(