After being nearly knocked off my bike by a van driver cutting accross the cycle path (runs between 2 lanes for a while on Wood Lane) I shouted “watch out!” in the slightly pathetic way that my shouting allways seems to come out*. The response of the van driver?
“FUCKING LONDON WANKER! FUCKING LEARN TO DRIVE! YOU DESERVE WHAT YOU GET! THATS WHY YOU GET FUCKING BOMBED!”
So there you have it, the London bombings were a direct result of my cycling. Quite shocking really.
*I wish I was a better shouter; I always kind of lose heart and it comes out sounding more wounded and complaining than indignant or angry or aggressive.
And then Dan said:
Wear your keys on your knuckles when you cycle. That way you can destroy the paintwork as a van goes past you at 80 mph using their own momentum to damage their property.
Either that, or learn to shout louder and more abusively. I would favour:
“You fucking subhuman scum. Go fuck your mother.”
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